Sport Chit Chat

This year, TSN bought the rights to the “Hockey Night in Canada” theme song. That means that Saturday night hockey in Canada, which is broadcast on the publicly owned CBC, will not longer have its epic musical accompaniment that most Canadians have come to hold dear. Some have called this song a second national anthem for Canada.

This summer the CBC has been running a competition to come up with a new Hockey Anthem. Well guess what CBC? THERE WILL NEVER BE ANOTHER HOCKEY ANTHEM. There may be many more theme songs in my lifetime, but this will stay as the Hockey Anthem for a very long time. Unlike Sunday/Monday night football which has a different theme every year, Canadians wait patiently From May to October to hear those powerful chords that signify that the puck drop is near. While I commend CBC in its marketing campaign that has gained a lot of publicity from its contest, the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation needs to understand that there is will only ever be one Anthem. Anything else is simply a theme song.
TSN meanwhile has been struggling with the fact that they bought an expensive piece of music and CBC still has all the publicity. To combat this, TSN is getting Canadian artists to cover the coveted hockey anthem. I hope the Tragically Hip do something sweet.
The new CBC theme will be announced today. www.cbc.ca has the finalists. Check em out.

-Apples

According to X-Box Live news feed, the San Jose sharks have hired John Ferguson Jr. as a scout.
Ferguson acted as Leafs GM from 2003 until he was fired near the end of last season. Ferguson is widely credited with making terrible business decisions and signing awful players to large contracts with ‘no trade’ clauses.
As a scout in San Jose, Ferguson poses little threat to the organization. Still it is this writer’s opinion that Police officials in the San Jose area should go on high alert from this point on. When Ferguson is involved there is a good chance things might crash and burn.

With a winning record in 2007-08, it only makes sense that the man, the legend, the one person Toronto fans love to cheer for most starts between the pipes for the Leafs in pre-season 2008-09. CUJO was 3-2-0 with Calgary last year and that earns him the start in Toronto tonight.

As I write this and watch Jason Blake take the ceremonial puck drop, I am immediately reminded of the feelings I get watching CUJO in net. I have never been a goalie fan. What I mean by this is that I have never liked a goalie more than I like a player. I like tough goal scoring forwards and although Patrick Roy really stole my heart during the Avalanche’s Stanley Cup runs in the ’95 but the only goalies whose jersey I would buy are Felix Potvin and for some reason Curtis Joseph.

My brother had a CUJO jersey as a kid and I was jealous. CUJO is not the best goalie in the world. Hell at this point in his career I’m not even certain he is the best goalie I can see right now (Shout outs to Maxmillien the Fantasy Guru), but CUJO can make saves that makes my heart leap with joy. He passes the puck majestically; he does things that keep his team in games when they shouldn’t be. While I realize that lots of goalies do this, CUJO has the luxury of being a Leaf and therefore having a spot in my heart.

But the other side of CUJO is the letdown side. And the presence of this side is why I never bought a CUJO jersey of my own. CUJO can be awesome but CUJO can also suck. Everyone who was watched him knows what I mean. They know that he can let ion goals from bizarre angles, leave space between his pads and the post and what I like least is just look disinterested. Some goalies have a fiery passion (Dominic Hasek), but CUJO always looks like a businessman who couldn’t care less. That frustrates me beyond belief.

If I had a nickname like CUJO id try to live up to it game in, game out. But I will probably only see CUJO a handful of times this season so I will hope that I can see the good and not the bad. Hopefully he will save the bad for his off days and only screw up opening the bench door for his team mates.

Good Luck CUJO, I’ll be rooting for you.

Back to Part I here.
Force Unleashed: That is a great trailer. It looks like you get to fight Vader at the end. I wonder if you get to kill him? That wouldn’t fit with the movies very well. It would kind of ruin the movie I just watched.

Ultimate Fighter Preview: Jose Aguilar just compared himself to Hitler and claimed the he “belongs raping and piliging dawg, straight up criminal dawg.” That’s really a terrible thing to say. I think if that is the way that all fighters are like, this is not a sport I can like.

Guida vs. Danzig: I pick Guida. He reminds me of this guy I went to highschool with. It’s the hair.

3:19 left in fight: I have no idea what just happened or who was hurt more, but Guida just got on Danzig’s back. But that move beforehand was awesome. They were just entangled. Guida is going to kill this guy… Danzig looks like Helo from Battlestar Gallactica.

I haven’t written much this round because I have been having a snack. It important to stay full while watching the UFC. I don’t want to do it on an empty stomach.

Wow Guida just ended by pummelling the shit out of a guy.
That was a great fight.
And a dedication to those who were affected by Hurricane Ike. This is a surprisingly well spoken man. Considering that the last guy just got angry.

Wow the screen just showed 3 hot UFC fans. I think the entire point of that was “see there are just dicks here, there are a few big boobs as well.” Essentially a way of saying “women like the UFC too.”

I’m fairly certain that there was a trailer for that new Dane Cook movie (it also has the guy that humps the pie in it) that was just a scene from the movie. WHY? I don’t want to watch that movie now. I already know how one scene will go. That’s just weird.

Diaz vs. Neer: Ok now its time for the marquee fight. One guy comes from a fighting family. I guess that is important. I don’t know why, but it seems like it makes sense. Maybe genetics plays a role.
Neer just called himself “the best competition” but crafted it in a way that it was a compliment to his opponent. That is sly. Well played Neer, well palyed.
The music is very chill for the entrance of the fighters. Do the fighters pick the music like baseball players pick the song that they can go to the plate to?

Nate Diaz is punching himself in the face. That is bizarre.

I pick Neer. I know I could be very wrong here. But I gotta give it a shot.

Diaz is way too crazy. He wont stop moving back and forth.

3:50 left in 1st: It looks like I am making the right choice. This Neer fellow is stronger than Diaz. I also like it that I can never forget which one is Neer, he has that big tattoo on his back with his name. Always there to remind us.

4:05 left in 2nd: Diaz is slippery. The announcers have made sure I know that. They keep saying it. But it is true. He is moving like a spider…

2:30 left in 2nd: Neer had him and couldn’t finish. You always need to finish.

Two huge punches at the end of the Second. But I didn’t see their resuly because of this stupid cut to commercial.

OK so a great third round and a good fight. It reminds me of that scene in office space where they destroy the printer. Except the printer fought back in this version. Now I wait for the final decision while I watch Burger King commercials over and over again.

Well there it is. Diaz wins. And so ends my first UFC battle. I struggled through but made it to the end. At points I wanted to stop watching, but I never let my guard down. I kept going and in the end it was worth it. UFC isn’t that bad. But I’ll take a hockey game over it any day. Sorry UFC. Maybe if it was played on ice.

Read Part II Here
I have never watched a UFC fight before. I have seen pieces of fights as I flip through channels. Or at a friend’s place if they have the TV on. But I have never sat down to watch a UFC event. As I am watching the end of Star Wars Return of the Jedi, and I am seeing commercials for this event, Nate Diaz vs. Josh Neer, and I feel the need to watch it. I mean there has to be a reason that so many people like it.

40 minutes to Fight Night Live: The death star has just fired on a Rebel cruiser. Luke is fighting the dark inside him.

30 min to: Luke kicks Vader down the stairs. “Obi-Wan has taught you well.” Now this is a fight.

2 min 45 seconds to: All the main characters are rejoicing with the Ewoks, if this is the case, who is guarding the fleet? Piloting the ships. Is noone worried that there are sill high ranking empire officials who want to attack them? Furthermore, what the hell made George Lucas decide to put the spirit of young Anakin Skywalker on the screen with Yoda and Obi-Wan? Why wouldn’t the spirit look like the Vader that died? And if they look like the young versions of themselves why isn’t Ewan McGregor’s image on the screen.

Opening Credits: Sick music.

Live from Nebraska: Is the UFC the only sport that openly associates itself with the reality show of itself? I don’t think football ever advertises “2 a Days.” Clay Guida is a scary looking guy, I wouldn’t want to meet him in an alley.

Alexander vs. Schaffer: Home town advantage. I root for Houston Alexander. He is going to give his home town a good showing. Wow. Omaha is now booing Schaffer. I didn’t know that home town fans rooted for their boys so much.

4:04 left in 1st: A great kick to the leg by Houston, but ehy are his shorts so tight and short. Can’t he wear board shorts likr the other guy?

2:10 left: Feel good story about the home town hero. But my roommate points out that a guy with 6 kids has no business being in the ring where he could make them all orphans.

0:50 left: And this is exactly why. Continuous blows to the head are not good for anyone.

SCHAFER WINS!! Oh wow, the Assassin taps out. “That is the greatest shit of all time” Schafer’s buddy says to him. And the line on Shafer’s shirt “Jesus didn’t tap.” You know this guy is full of himself. But I guess you have to think you are the shit to get in the Octagon on a regular basis.
I enjoyed my first fight. It went a full round, I got to see a guy get pummelled in the face, tap out due to an ‘arm triangle’ (I don’t know what that is but it sounds sweet). Hey Star Wars The Force Unleashed sponsors the UFC. When Jedi’s back your sport you know something good is going down for you.
Shout out to the deceased hero, classic.
And back to commercials.

I don’t know what pit fight is. But the commercial that just aired makes it look awesome. If this fight keeps me interested, maybe I will watch that.

Opportunity Knocks. A new show. Whoever thought to bring reality TV and game shows together is an idiot. (Granted I openly hate reality TV but still this looks dumb) How much of the show is a game show and how much is them turning the street into a game show. Will I get to here sappy family stories if I watch. This sounds like shit. I encourage you to watch.

Herman vs. Belcher: Herman seems to be confident that he will control the fight, claiming to be able to keep it standing or on the ground depending on what he wants. So I will pick Alan ‘the Talent’ Belcher. (Note that I never read anything on these fighters and are picking them solely by nicknames and facial expressions only.) How do I keep picking the guys with short shorts.

3:52 left in first: I just realized what the Ultimate Fighter is like. It is like Farm Teams. They need to develop new talent right, cause Chuck Lidell (the only MMA fighter I have ever heard of, thanks Entourage!) won’t fight forever. So they use this reality show, get to air it and make money from it and hopefully get some new fighters ready to go.

1:50 left in 1st: Apparently some time in Thailand will not only make you stronger but it will also sharpen your mind! What great colour commentary.

0:10 left in 1st: Herman keeps going for some kind of choke. All I think is Vulcan Death Grip. As soon as the bell rings they go to commercial. Not even a lead out. That is maximizing ad space!

2:45 left in 2nd: A switch to southpaw by my boy Belcher. A risky move considering the constraints of dexterity.

0:09 left in 2nd: Wow what a punch. Fakes him out by looking to the side and then just jumps and punches to the top of the head. Its my kind of move. I picked the right guy, win or lose.

4:59 left in 3rd: They start by high fiving. How cute.

2:15 left in third: Belcher keeps looking at the clock. I can’t tell if this is good or bad. Is he tired or cocky? Or is he in league with the mafia and needs Herman to fall at a certain point.

Fight over. They go the distance. Impressive feat of athletic ability. One Vote Belcher. One against. SPLIT DECISION. My boy wins. It was all the superman punch. OK, this guy is crazy. Literally, he can’t talk right now. He is getting defensive about his critics. And now he told the place where to go party. Do MMA fighters get to drink, or is that against their training? Either way I bet that is a good party. Or at least a good sausage fest.

Now this can hardly be considered ‘news’ at this point, but it deserves some Chit Chat recognition none-the-less. Robert Lang was traded on September 12th from the Chicago Blackhawks, to the Montreal Canadiens for a second round draft pick. This is an excellent acquisition for the Canadiens. Lang is a 6-3, 216 lb centre. This makes him unique in a Montreal lineup saturated with small (albeit talented) centres such as Tomas Plekanec and Saku Koivu. Bringing Lang into the picture gives Montreal a core group of 7 forwards who are all capable of scoring over 50 points. Along with former teammate Alex Kovalev, Lang joins Andrei Kistitsyn, Tomas Plekanec, Saku Koivu, Christopher Higgins and fellow new acquisition, Alex Tanguay. This new Canadien ‘Group of Seven’ will definitely bring Montreal deep in the playoffs in the 2008-09 campaign.
While Bob Gainey may have looked silly last season for trading Christobal Huet for a second round draft pick, he did well for himself in turning that pick into the powerful and talented Robert Lang.
Look for Lang to score around 60 points in his new setting.

Lang, part of the new Canadien 'Group of Seven'

Unlike with the Eastern Conference, where the Wade Redden signing stuck out like a sore thumb as a poor decision, the Western Conference does not seem to have as many stupid off season signings. Or at the very least the stupidity appears to be overshadowed by some smart moves. For that reason I have decided to select three signings that get a large thumbs up and 1 team that receives a “what the hell did you do that for?” thumb to the forehead.

I would like to start with the good signings. First off, top honours goes to the Detroit Red Wings. Hockey Town USA scored yet again by signing Marian Hossa to a one-year, $7.4 million contract. Detroit kept the important pieces of their Stanley Cup winning team and added yet another strong scorer. Hossa had 66 points in 72 games last season and was an important piece of the Pittsburgh Penguins’ playoff run. A one-year contract could have even be an under sight for the 29-year-old powerhouse. On Detroit’s part, they should have tried to lock in the consistent scorer for a longer period of time. Despite his decrease from 100 points two seasons ago, Hossa remained a formidable force this past season. Hossa himself should have looked for a longer contract from the Red Wings, since their current talent, and great nucleus of young talent put them in good standing to raise Stanley a few more times in years to come. I have no idea who is at fault for making the one-year decision, but kudos to the Red Wings for brining in such a great player none-the-less.

Another thumbs up goes to the Dallas Stars for signing Sean Avery to a 4-year, $15.5 million contract. Avery impressed me this past season with his 33 points and 154 minutes in penalties. I used to consider him to be a pest not worth anyone’s time, but in the middle of the Jason Blake vs. Sean Avery war of words, my good friend the Fantasy Guru Maxmillien pointed out Avery’s worth… he is a pest not worth anyone’s time. Other teams loathe him and goalies want to blocker him in the face. But all of that makes Sean Avery a very valuable commodity. His gritty play and surprising scoring touch during the playoffs made NYR games exciting to watch. Plus, any guy who can date Elisha Cuthbert has to get a thumbs up. Congrats Dallas, you are now home to the NFL’s and NHL’s bad boys.

I would like to now give the Chicago Blackhawks two thumbs up. That’s right, TWO!

The first is for signing Brian Campbell to an 8 year, $56.8 million contract. Campbell is in my opinion one of the foremost offensive-defencemen in the league. Since playing his first full season in 2002-03, Campbell’s point totals have climbed steadily higher. Last season, his 62 points were a career high. The one thing that puts Campbell above his peers is his ability to move the puck. While he only scored 8 goals on 142 shots last season, his 54 assists make him ideal to lead Chicago’s young and talented powerplay. Look for Campbell to have another great season in the windy city.
The second thumb is for signing goaltender Christobal Huet to a 4 year, $22.4 million contract. With Khabibulin finishing up his 4 year contract this season Chicago will be looking for another number one to replace him. Khabibulin has struggled since arriving in Chicago. His 17, 25 and 23 wins in each of the past three seasons respectively, have not made him the Stanley Cup winning goalie that Chicago thought they were signing. Huet on the other hand had an excellent start to the season with Montreal and made Bob Gainey look like a fool for trading him for a 2nd round draft pick at the deadline. Huet can command much more on the open market and Chicago was smart to pay him good wages for the next 4 seasons. He was 21 and 12 while with Montreal last season and was an impressive 11 and 2 after being traded to Washington. The Capitals should have held on to this netminder because there is no doubt in my mind that he will become one of the top goalies in the league by the time his contract expires in Chicago. Maybe Campbell and Huet are the pieces that the Blackhawks need to bring glory back to this ‘original 6’ city.

Now for the part where I metaphorically flick someone in the forehead for being an idiot. Today’s honour goes to the entire Colorado Avalanche’s front office. Whose bonehead idea was it to bring in Toronto’s trash? Does anyone believe that Andrew Raycroft will win them anything? The only thing Raycroft is good for is picking up the number one overall draft pick, and that is only if you actually decide to play him. I realize that one year at $800,000 is not that big of a deal. However, the fact that Raycroft is still on an NHL team is ridiculous. Andrew Raycroft is truly good at one thing, talking to the press. Therefore, I suggest that the Avalanche move him quickly to the podium after games and let him handle all questions in a humourous way. That is the only way that it will be $800,000 well spent. (Just as a note, other things that you can buy for $800,000: 381 MacBook Pros, 2 2008 Ferrari 612 Scagliettis, 30303 cases of Pabst Blue Ribbon.) The Avalanche also picked up Darcy Tucker for $4.5 million over 2 seasons. Tucker is a huge fan favourite in Toronto but this does not make him worth anyone’s money. Tucker is old, slow and has lost the grit that made him an NHL commodity. While Tucker is still willing to stand up for his team mates suffering from Leukemia, he does not posses the strength or speed necessary to dig the puck out of the corners. Good luck to the avalanche with their new acquisitions, I suppose they have resolved themselves to making this year a rebuilding one.

I would also like to give a pre-emptive flick to the forehead to the Florida Panthers should they decide to accept a trade for Bryan McCabe. McCabe and Raycroft could captain ‘Team Useless’ at the Olympics in 2010.

-Apples

While signings in the NHL this off season have been anything but slow, acquisitions that stand out about all are few and far between. With superstars like Jaromir Jagr heading overseas to play and Mats Sundin considering hanging up his skates, many of the Eastern Conferences teams look to be in a similar position that they found themselves in last year. For some however, this is not such a bad thing, as keeping their personnel puts some in good standing for the future. However others may find themselves on thin ice for the years to come.

Lets start with the positive. The Tampa Bay Lightning made the obvious choice in drafting Steve Stamkos first overall and signing him to a 3-year entry-level contract. However, it is their signing of a former number one pick that gets them a large plus in my books. The 11-year contract given to Vincent Lecavalier is one of the smartest off-season moves by any Eastern Conference team thus far. While helping lead the Lightning to a Stanley Cup in 2003-04 he has also proved his value in the post-lockout game. Lecavalier has been a 35+ goal scorer in each of the last 3 seasons, winning the Maurice “Rocket” Richard Trophy in 06-07 and cashing in 92 points this past season. While the 11-year contract makes him a member of the Lightning until he is 40 it puts the team in good standing to build around a true franchise player. There is no doubt in my mind that his presence will help shape Stamkos into the superstar he has the potential to become. With the loss of Brad Richards last season, the Lightning will be looking to maintain their powerplay prowess. Lecavalier can lead this charge with 29 powerplay points last season and the potential to connect with Stamkos who played the powerplay throughout his junior career. Lecavalier’s front loaded contract which pays him $10 million over the first 6 seasons, and decreases steadily to only $1 million in the final year of his contract opens up cap space in the future when Tampa Bay will need to reenergize their offence. Due to the importance of Lecavalier as a leader, point getter and the brilliant front loading of his contract, this signing gets top honours in the Eastern Conference thus far.

While re-signing their top scorer is a great move for the Lightning, the New York Rangers have replaced Jaromir Jagr with the aging Markus Naslund. Only time will tell whether $8 million over two seasons for the former Canuck will pay off for the Rangers. They need to replace Jagr’s leadership and scoring prowess and Naslund may fit the bill. However, by locking up $39 million over the next six years in the 31-year-old Wade Redden, the Rangers may have blown any opportunity to find someone other than Naslund in the years to come. Scoring does not come cheap and committing that much cash to a defenseman who scored a measly 38 points with Ottawa last season may have unnecessarily handcuffed their club. As Scott Cullen reported, Redden is an undersized and slower than average D. I can see no reason to sign a player for an average of $6.5 million per season for the next 6 years when they can’t defend against young and aggressive opponents even today. Overpaying Redden for lack of offensive prowess over the past few seasons combined with this lack of defensive presence and aging body makes him the worst Eastern Conference signing thus far this summer.

Soon we look at the West.